I know its been hours since I commented (the equivalent of a lifetime in this thread) but I can't get off the whole idea of Ponies and Resident Evil
So I present to you the following brainfart:
Resident Ponyvil
"whew!" said Rarity. "I'm glad we made it to this mansion!"
Then Applejack looked around. "Hey, where's Pinkie?"
Twilight shook her head. "It's hard to say, but she's probably..."
Then they hear the distinct sound of a Party Cannon off in the distance.
"What was that?" Rarity asked.
Twilight said "Rarity, you go and check."
Applejack said "Ahm goin' too! Pinkie's our old partner ya know!"
* * *
Applejack handed Rarity a lockpick and said "Here, take this. It might be better for you, the Master of Unlocking, to have this."
"And how exactly does a pony pick locks?"
"With Friendship!"
"Friendship?"
"Yeah. Friendship is magic, ya know!"
* * *
Suddenly Rarity turned and fired. A dog whimpered just offscreen.
Applejack wanted to know "How did ya'll know it was there? I can't see anything from this camera angle!"
"Oh Applejack. After awhile, you start to get a sense for it." then Rarity fired another shot, the dog whimpered once more, and never rose again.
Applejack could only complain "Man, whah couldn't this be a parody of the newfangled Resident Evils with the over-the-shoulder camera..."
"Oh, you're just unskilled!" Rarity claimed right before she headed through a door. Applejack heard her fire more shots in the next room.
* * *
"Twilight Sparkle! So YOU'RE behind all of this!"
"Yes!" Twilight said, "This whole thing was a plot so I could steal the T-Virus and sell it on the black market!"
Rarity rolled her eyes. "Twi, you're the student of a goddess and you personally know someone whose talent is digging up diamonds. Why pray tell would you
need to make money on the black market."
That stumped Twilight. "Umm... well... because Friendship is Magic! That's why!"
"I suppose you wouldn't believe me if I said Tyrant was going to impale you at any moment."
Now it was Twilight's turn to roll her eyes. "Oh Rarity, you're so naive."
"So you don't believe me."
"No, it's just that I know I'll come back inexplicably alive a few games from now. Also I have a picture of Rainbow Dash in a basketball uniform in my desk at the police station."
That got Rarity to raise her eyebrows.
Then Tyrant impaled Twilight Sparkle. But it was okay, because she'd be alive again a few games from now.
* * *
... Yeah, I'm done posting fanfiction in the wrong thread. Continue your regularly scheduled discussion. (and anyone who would honestly like to see me try to turn this into a real 'fic, raise your hoof)